4.20.2010

A Prayer for Califmom from an agnostic UU Mom also widowed by cancer



(Read Califmom's blog and tweetstream)

Once upon a time, it was considered “profane” to invoke a deity if you didn’t have faith. These names should only be issued when you really mean it. A non-believer doesn’t own both “sacred” and “profane” expressions, whether he says “J*sus” or “f*ck,” he’s using profanity. (This is without even going into more complicated theological constructions such as “Holy shit.”)

But our everyday cuss is uttered casually, in rage, in shock. We might use a curse word to provoke, to insult, to demonstrate contempt, or to avoid saying something much more serious. We curse when we’re together, aroused, and when we feel most alone, in awe or completely confused: “WTF?” Hence the double meaning of “swearing” or using an “oath,” archaic terms which have given way to the definitely negative “cursing.”

So any prayer for Califmom, who has been helping her husband “fuck cancer in the ass,” from me, an agnostic contemplating seminary, is by definition profane. She deserves no less.


My prayer for Califmom

Here is what I wish for you, inspiring woman, true voice, brave Momma, hilarious warrior, sister widow, friend I’ve never met:

May you find peace
(#fuckcancer)
May those who love you allow you room
(#fuckcancer)
May your children continue to teach you
(#fuckcancer)
May your “before” world remain bright and clear
(#fuckcancer)
May your friends listen and hear your needs
(#fuckcancer)
May you find company and not conflict in your grief
(#fuckcancer)
May you keep your lovely world close and your kids well
(#fuckcancer)
May you keep first things first, and fun things fun
(#fuckcancer)
May you listen to your grieving body
(#fuckcancer)
May someone else be willing and able to handle the paperwork, hereafter to be known as the Dreaded Bureaucracy of Death (DBoD)
(#fuckcancer)
May you be kind, generous, and patient with yourself
(#fuckcancer)
May you find righteousness and a bitchin’ great story in Chapter Two
(#fuckcancer)
May you find peace.
May you find peace.
May you find peace.

(Also? Did you ever notice that "refrain" means both the phrase you repeat after every verse AND "stop it?")

* * * I'd be honored to hear your response in a comment or through other connection (Facebook, Twitter, Formspring, at right) * * *

8 comments:

Stimey said...

You can add my athiestic name to that prayer.

Alicia said...

With full faith in a loving deity, I say with you, "FUCK CANCER!"

Jessica Seuss said...

As an Agnostic Jew, who lost her Dad to soon to cancer, I too will say "fuckcancer!"

Ameyn.

Sherry said...

I've managed to keep from crying all day. And then I read your line about the "before world." Now I'm crying for her and for us. Fuck cancer.

Sherry

Supa Dupa Fresh said...

Amen, sisters. I'm crying, too. #fuckcancer #fuckcancer #fuckcancer #fuckcancer #fuckcancer

CJ Marley said...

Yes...I will scream it at the top of my lungs, I will whisper it to any who will listen and I will speak it with passion...#FUCKCANCER (and I know my DH is saying it too wherever he is now).

califmom said...

Thank you.

Supa Dupa Fresh said...

{{{califmom}}}}

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