2.25.2007

Who am I? [updated Aug. 2008]

Unbelievable – it’s past two years, now.

Since?... My darling daughter, Short Stack, is 4 and a half. When she was 7 months, my husband was diagnosed with a stage 4 rare cancer with very limited treatment options. He fought for 22 months, and everything wore down. He died. That’s where I started counting.

Since then, it’s been a lot of bumps, a bunch of lows, and a long steady period of uphill.

I started dating around 16 months. Some crazy and fun experiences brought me back to who I really am, who I hadn’t been for a long, long time.

Now I live with Hunky Fiancé. Life is stable and quite good. I’m still picking up many, many pieces but I’m strong enough to do it.

Why blog now? There aren’t enough of these stories and people need to hear them. Young widows and widowers were my path to sanity, health, and a future. Every week I went to group, every day I spoke to a widow BFF on the phone. Now, writing may help me process and connecting allows me to give back what I got so much of.

And maybe someone is listening? Write me at supa.dupa.fresh AT gmail DOT com.

6 comments:

hahamommy said...

I was widowed at 32, with 2 & 4 year old children. DH, Mitch, had a polio-vax related brain tumor. Chemo claimed him almost 3 years post dx (yes I was preggers with #2 when he siezed and a goose-egg sized tumor was discovered!). Now I'm down to one offspring, as the Dead Guy claimed our daughter 3 years ago (leukemia) and one amazing Super Cool Boyfriend ♥

JoAnne Funch said...

Yes, someone is listening. In fact I've been doing some research on-line to see who is talking about death, grief, widowhood and the like. I too am a widow, my husband died in 2005 and I am still single. Did a little dating...I'm still working at moving on and finding my place in my new world. In my search I felt called to help others on their journey through grief, have started a sit called; http://heartachetohealing.com/blog

I want to make a difference in the life of those left behind. anyone is welcome to submit an article to my site, I want personal input not clinical articles.

JoAnne Funch
with hope & inspiration
twitter.com/joannefunch
http://www.heartachetohealing.com/blog

kayfish said...

I wasn't exactly widowed, but a few years after I divorced my first husband, he was killed, leaving me to explain murder to our 5 year old son. I am only now realizing how much I was traumatized. I am ashamed of how poorly I handled things. I was remarried at the time with a 6 month old daughter. I drowned this marriage in alcohol and lost both kids in divorce. But truly, I've finally come a long way and healing is finally happening. Thanks for your blog.

Andrea Renee said...

I just found your blog, and I'm looking forward to reading more. My husband was killed in an industrial accident at work in November of 2008, leaving me and our two kids (now 2 & 5). I have found writing to be very healing, and through that, I've found a whole network of other people going through the same thing. Thank goodness for the internet!

dyann said...

I lost my husband to a heart attack in june 2007, but I had lost him to alcohol quite some time before. I was left with 2 gorgeous kids, 3 and 1 at the time, now 5 and 3. Even though his death actually made some things easier, I wish I had the man I fell in love with back. I'm moving on in life and love. I'm looking forward to reading your blog.

Supa Dupa Fresh said...

Dyann,

I'm so sorry for both of your losses. I hear some complicated stories! Please let me know if you'd like help connecting with other resources.

Sounds like you have a lot of energy right now, even with two small kids, I'll look forward to hearing more about you!

X

Supa

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