tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3599655836040142750.post4793347001149334837..comments2023-07-31T09:35:21.967-04:00Comments on Fresh Widow: Young Widow Support Groups, 2: My Top 10 ListSupa Dupa Freshhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07659738264922395349noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3599655836040142750.post-88388523929593239752012-08-27T14:16:31.580-04:002012-08-27T14:16:31.580-04:00Shared all over the place Supa....Great post, grea...Shared all over the place Supa....Great post, great series! Widow_Lady302https://www.blogger.com/profile/02473728003078221688noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3599655836040142750.post-67645507557302849852009-10-24T21:48:25.652-04:002009-10-24T21:48:25.652-04:00C,
I think "peers" is really the key poi...C,<br />I think "peers" is really the key point, because groups can be so rare. What did people do before we all went online? Were neighbors, friends, and family better? I doubt it.<br />I'm thankful we all have each other to bounce ideas off, real life or virtual.<br /><br />HUGS to you and yours!<br /><br />SupaSupa Dupa Freshhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07659738264922395349noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3599655836040142750.post-69492470773257760952009-10-24T03:53:15.689-04:002009-10-24T03:53:15.689-04:00Hi Supa,
I doubt there is a group in my community...Hi Supa,<br /><br />I doubt there is a group in my community - I've breifly looked on-line and in the paper - because I live in a pretty small community and, as you said, we young widows are a pretty rare group.<br /><br />I've found the on-line bloggers (such as yourself) to be my current source of support, reducing the isolating feeling that no one 'gets' you, and it's been incredibly helpful. I may try a few of your other tips though, and really appreciate you taking the time to lay it all out like that.<br /><br />~C~Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3599655836040142750.post-14767657356285345502009-10-21T10:00:25.200-04:002009-10-21T10:00:25.200-04:00Annie,
I know a lot of people who “made do,” and ...Annie,<br /><br />I know a lot of people who “made do,” and several who flourished, without formal support groups. I put a lot of my social steam toward promoting them because they can be such a lifeline, and since it’s so ridiculously hard to find appropriate services. Plus, even with babysitting and gas money, groups are a mental-health bargain.<br /><br />I’m grateful that my group didn’t really do much of the “stages” stuff. It was helpful to read Kubler-Ross on my own time (partly to help with processing the years of Gavin’s illness), but accepting and understanding grief seem less important for those of us with complicated grief. Again, my observation and unprofessional opinion.<br /><br />Thanks for all the fantastic writing you do about your experiences! I admire your energy and gifts.<br /><br />Best,<br /><br />SupaSupa Dupa Freshhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07659738264922395349noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3599655836040142750.post-22435066490186217662009-10-21T08:40:32.005-04:002009-10-21T08:40:32.005-04:00I didn't do groups, but I did do one-on-one, a...I didn't do groups, but I did do one-on-one, and came to very much the same conclusions.<br /><br />The points you make all really need saying, loud and clear to everyone who lives through this war (because that's exactly what it is). But there's more here -- because you're so thought-provoking, too, about how this all changes you.<br /><br />I think it was Kate Boydell who surprised me first, by saying that her 'new' life was so different, because bereavement had finally 'enriched her life'. That wasn't a description I found easy to relate to, because, let's face it -- it's not easy to explore.<br /><br />Time passes, and life changes. You may (no -- will, and for a long time) try not to move on, but finally you wake up one day to see that life winds new circles around you. Suddenly, it would be impossible for your spouse to come back, because the life they lived with you is no longer there.<br /><br />I'll come back to this idea shortly, but I still need more thought to explain it coherently. That might take me another decade or two, but trust me -- I'll work on it. And meanwhile, thanks for setting out the questions so clearly.Roadshttp://thepriceoflove.netnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3599655836040142750.post-11505564079281380102009-10-20T17:24:29.958-04:002009-10-20T17:24:29.958-04:00These are really great suggestions for connecting ...These are really great suggestions for connecting with a group! Thank You, I will pass them on.JoAnne Funchhttp://www.heartachetohealing.com/blognoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3599655836040142750.post-44414486707309929472009-10-20T15:03:17.304-04:002009-10-20T15:03:17.304-04:00Very sane - you are...got lots to say and you are ...Very sane - you are...got lots to say and you are doing lots of good for all the widows who read you.<br /> Gonna list you on my favorites on my blog.Carol Scibellihttp://www.poorwidowme.blogspot.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3599655836040142750.post-22731310715623432772009-10-20T13:39:12.269-04:002009-10-20T13:39:12.269-04:00I am glad that I didn't find a group early on ...I am glad that I didn't find a group early on - though I looked hard. Even after finding one, I found that my personal situation was too different for even other widowed people to relate to and it was frustrating to be around people who wanted to turn back time while I was eager to find my legs and run again.<br /><br />When I tried groups again (via a children's grief group for my daughter) I was two years out and remarried and found I enjoyed reassuring people new to the whole thing, but the whole stages mumbo-jumbo still rankled and the stereotypes that widowed even have of each other was mildly annoying.<br /><br />I am not disagreeing with you. I think that most widowed benefit from groups, but I never found a fit.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com